..:: Smurf compressor ::..

Esse texto rolou há anos atrás nos BBSs que freqüentei. Seu copyright data de 1995. Muito maneiro e criativo. Eu o havia perdido, mas graças a memória dos amigos e seus HDs espaçosos, eu o tenho de volta. Agora compartilho com os mais novos que nunca tiveram a chance de ver até onde chega a criatividade humana.

Ah! O texto é em inglês, mas para aqueles que sacam de informática, conhecem um pouquinho do idioma britânico e conheceram os anãezinhos azuis do desenho animado, é uma boa e divertida leitura.

                   SMURF COMPRESSOR UTILITY
                        Version 1.00a
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            Copyright 1995 by OMNY SoftWorks, Inc.
                     All rights reserved
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SUMMARY:

       1 - OVERVIEW

              1.1 - What is SMURF?
              1.2 - System Requirements
              1.3 - New compression technology
              1.4 - Who will use SMURF?

       2 - HOW TO USE SMURF

       3 - TROUBLESHOOTING

       4 - CONTACTING OMNY SOFTWORKS, INC.



1 - OVERVIEW
------------

1.1 - What is SMURF?

      SMURF is a tiny blue being that used to live in a magic forest
a long time ago.
      It was so small that its enemies used to think that they could
capture and turn it into gold in a easy way. But that task soon
became impossible to be accomplished because of the great powers of
Papa Smurf, the leader of the SMURFs.
      Based on this true story, OMNY Softworks contacted Papa Smurf
and together they created a magical algorithym to compress any type 
of files. Due to magic, it can compress everything up to 99% of its
original size. And if you smurf a smurfed file, it will be compressed
again! It's just amazing...


1.2 - System Requirements:

      To use the SMURF COMPRESSOR you need a computer.
      We fully recomend the Reflact-XWENG multi purpose card to
achieve the unimagible 100% compression, without it, the maximum
ratio will be limited to 99% (The minimum compression will always 
be 90%, better then all the compression utilities in the market 
today).


1.3 - New compression technology:

      The great SMURF COMPRESSOR uses a new technology that allows
it to compress from 90% up to 99%. Its code was also developed with
the help of Reflact Technologies and will provide a 100% compression
on machines equiped with the famous Reflact-XWENG card.
      The new code is entirely based on a secret magic spell created
by Papa Smurf and will not be revealed in this ASCII file. You may
order the uncompiled code by sending 1 million dollars to:

                        OMNY Softworks, Inc.

      For more information on how to contact us, read the last part
of this file.


1.4 - Who will use SMURF?

      Everyone who do not need to uncompress the compressed file (we
don't have a UN-SMURFer yet) will be interested in our product because
it will compress ANY FILE into a new file with less then 1K of size.
So, if you have a computer, you'll just love SMURF!



2 - HOW TO USE SMURF

      Its really simple. The version 1.00 do require any parameter.
It's just set to provide the best compression. You just have to type:

                       SMURF FILE.ABC

where FILE.ABC is your original file. The result will be a file 
named FILE.SMF that is the smurfed version of your original file, 
created be the SMURF COMPRESSOR.


3 - TROUBLESHOOTING

      Some bugs were reported by our beta-testers:

      1 - We can't uncompress an SMF file!

      That is normal and you should not be worried by this little
      problem.  We just don't have any plans of developing an
      un-smurfing utility. Be sure to smurf only those files you'll
      never need again!


4 - CONTACTING OMNY SOFTWORKS

        If you need more information about our product send us an
E-MAIL via Internet. Our adresses are:

        rod@centroin.ax.apc.org

        phoenix@centroin.ax.apc.org

        We want also to make sure that we carry no responsabilities
related to SMURF.EXE. Use it at your own risk!

        Feel free to distribute SMURF COMPRESSOR to everybody you 
like or may dislike. I don't care if people call you nuts. So don't 
tell I didn't warn you.


                Copyright (C) 1995 by OMNY SoftWorks, Inc.

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